How to Embrace “The Mary Season”

In the last couple of years, I’ve realized that life has its seasons – not just climatically but personally. Some seasons I’ve been a goal-setter, a hustler, a manifestor; going for my dreams and bringing them to life. Other seasons – like the one that I’m currently in – it’s less about getting to the destination as it is about the journey. It’s about doing less and being more present. I’m calling this season, “The Mary Season.”

Inspired by the Biblical story of Martha and Mary, the Mary season is where God is currently calling me to be with him. I’m making my relationship with him, my relationship with myself, and my relationships with others, the highest priority instead of focusing the things that I honestly would rather be focusing on.

If you are someone like me who has always thrived on a packed schedule and a fast-paced lifestyle, transitioning to a slower pace can be difficult, especially if you feel that you are being called to a more peaceful, mindful place. Here is how I’ve learned to embrace The Mary Season.

What is The Mary Season?

If you’ve never heard of the Martha and Mary Story, let me break it down for you:

“As Jesus and the disciples continued on their way to Jerusalem, they came to a certain village where a woman named Martha welcomed him into her home. Her sister, Mary, sat at the Lord’s feet, listening to what he taught. But Martha was distracted by the big dinner she was preparing. She came to Jesus and said, “Lord, doesn’t it seem unfair to you that my sister just sits here while I do all the work? Tell her to come and help me.” But the Lord said to her, “My dear Martha, you are worried and upset over all these details! There is only one thing worth being concerned about. Mary has discovered it, and it will not be taken away from her.” – Luke 10:38-42 NLT

Basically, Mary was spending all the time with Jesus that she could get, while her sister, Martha, was working hard to make dinner, stressing about it, and feeling that it was unfair that her sister was choosing to spend time with Jesus instead of helping her cook the meal.

Not gonna lie to you, for a long time I didn’t get this story. In fact, I resonated more with Martha. Hustle to make your dreams come true. Hard work produces good results. It feels wrong to just be sitting around when there’s errands to run and to-do lists to complete.

But it wasn’t until a couple of months ago when everything clicked for me. Martha wasn’t wrong in wanting to prepare a beautiful feast for Jesus and his disciples, but she was caught up in the doing. She missed the point of Jesus even being there because she was more focused on her works, not his presence.

Mary got it. She knew that this was a special occasion, and she dropped everything and literally sat on the floor at Jesus’ feet, soaking in his goodness, his wisdom, and most importantly his love. The food could wait. The work could wait. Being there with God in the flesh was the important thing.

By shifting the focus from what needed to be done, to what was happening in that moment, Mary was content and peaceful. And that’s what The Mary Season is all about: embracing the present moment, spending more time with God, and reaping the benefits of slowing down.

How to Embrace Your Mary Season

Most of my life I’ve been living like Martha – working really hard, setting goals, and manifesting my dreams. This isn’t necessarily a bad thing, but I also wouldn’t say I was living most in alignment with my true self either. I spent a lot of time and chasing after things I thought would bring happiness, peace, and contentment, but they didn’t end up satisfying me in the long run, or in the way I thought they would. Throwing myself into relationships, and jobs, working long hours and getting little sleep, sacrificing my well-being time and time again – only to still feel that empty hole in my stomach.

Truthfully, I love setting and reaching goals. I’m a very driven person. Once I set my mind to something, I’m doing it, no matter my financial situation or if everyone tells me I’m crazy. Once I achieve a goal, I’ll immediately set a new one.

Nearly every person in my life laughed when I first told them about my dream of van life. It didn’t matter. I had tunnel vision. Nothing was going to stop me from reaching my goal. I was caught up in the doing. And I did it! But even then, living the nomadic life didn’t satisfy me the way I thought it would.

Now, God has me in a Mary Season. The pandemic was the start of it when all my dreams of attending festivals and traveling internationally flew out the window. The world came to a screeching, shuddering stop, and I had no choice but to turn inward.

Life has started to resume its regular frenzied pace again and I’ve tried to jump on the band wagon with my wild dreams, only to fall flat on face, because I’ve been trying to get out of my Mary Season, instead of embracing it. God has me here for a specific reason – or many reasons – and instead of resisting and fighting against the current, I’m learning how to surrender to the flow.

Life looks different in the Mary Season. And it can be tough when your life doesn’t look the way you thought it would, or the way you want it to. It’s frustrating to feel like you’re not creating any momentum or you’re not moving forward. It can be scary when God tells you to put those dreams on the backburner, and instead of working towards them, be still and enjoy the present moment for what it is.

Instead of scrambling up the peak of the mountain, God wants you to sit by the river. You watch friends and family and strangers on social media flow by in the stream of life, while you’re stuck on the muddy banks.

I’m not making as much money as I used to. I’m not as productive as I was in previous seasons. The most difficult concept to grasp is the fact that I have no real goals that I’m trying to reach.

That one has been tripping me up. What am I supposed to do if I’m not working towards something? I’ve asked God. What is the actual point of this?

It’s not about the doing, it’s about the being. God responded.

Being present. Being aware. Just being.

So I’ve been trying my best. I spend more time working on myself than I do on any goals. I express myself creatively through the blog when I feel called to, instead of posting consistently in an attempt to get more out of it, like I was doing before. I’m quite possible making the smallest amount of money since joining the workforce, but I’m learning  to rely on and trust that God will provide for me instead of trying to do it myself.

It’s not about my doing anymore. It’s not about my goals, but God’s. It’s about coming to rest in the presence of the Creator, to step into a deeper relationship with him and to spread that love to everyone else.

It’s about learning how to find that elusive peace and its cousin happiness in the simple intricacies of the everyday, like watching the stars shift in the sky with the seasons or taking the time to connect with a random stranger in the grocery store.

It’s teaching myself how to be grateful for everything I do have, like waking up in a comfortable, warm bed, instead of whining about the things I don’t have.

The Mary Season, I’m learning, is all about taking a pause, taking a breath, and instead of taking steps forward in the world, daring to take a step inward. The personal development that I’ve experienced in this season is unparalleled. The depth of relationship that God is calling me to is also… wild. Terrifying really.  

But I’ve learned that a life apart from God is no life at all. There will always be struggle and pain and issues to overcome no matter if you believe in God or not. But doing life with God makes the unbearable bearable. He gives me strength when I don’t think I can go any further. He provides for me just when I think there’s no way out. His love is what keeps me going, even in a season that I don’t love.

If God is calling you to be closer to him, go for it. As I touched on in my recent post, running from your spiritual path only results in exhaustion, pain, and frustration. Yes, it can be hard AF to listen to the intuitive call of Holy Spirit when you’re being guided somewhere that looks a lot different than where you want to be going. But stepping into your Mary Season will bring joy, peace, and fulfillment in way no other season can.

What kind of season are you in right now? Let me know in the comments below.